I was in to my daily routine of philosophizing when I realized something big.  It was huge!  It was like answering other life pondering questions such as: who built the pyramids, why are we here, and why did NBC take The A-Team off air?  For those who want to know what I realized when I came to enlightenment, it was this - life sucks!
      Especially work! Who invented labor? Who in the hell favored labor?  Who in the hell favored labor?  I mean, why couldn’t the people just have stoned the guy who said, “you all will work for me and I will pay you just enough to get by and want more!”
      Maybe there are a few of you who like working; who like attending to your “master” or “masters.”  Hell, in this day in age with commercialism and franchises, half of us have never really met our actual boss.
      Let me tell you a little about the first place I worked.  I will call it, “Red Monster.”  This place was a chain restaurant that sold seafood and whatever the hell else that looked like seafood but really came out of processing factories.  It hated it there.  I wanted to die the moment I walked in.  I hated the managers.  The thing about restaurant managers is that they KNOW their job sucks, but they can’t do anything about it so they decided long ago to make teenagers work for them.  You see, that restaurant is their future; they will work in that hellhole until they retire!  That actually makes me feel a little better. 
       However, for the short time I worked there, I came to realize why my working friends hated to work.  The General Manager of  “Red Monster” was Hitler reincarnated.  He was a short man who had the body figure that made him look like Rush Limbaugh from a certain angle.  He was neurotic.  Crazy!  Whoever gave him the keys to the store must have been heavily sedated!
      It seems to me that his life’s goal was to make me feel as if I was in hell every day I worked there.  For example, if my shoes weren’t tied he would lecture me for an hour.  “What if the customers limited down to see that your shoes weren’t tied?!?  People tie their shoes in higher class restaurants Ryan, maybe not at McDonald’s, but here we do!”  The thing is, I can’t help that my right shoe won’t tie.  I swear to god, I met a Gypsy once and shoe told me I would die by tripping over my right untied shoe.  Ever since then I can’t keep the damn thing tied!  But that’s another story.
      I was the Manager’s favorite subject.  He made me go outside during storms to water the plants, he made me clean the toilets after someone left a mess in there.  Then after coming out all dirty, he would yell at me for being all dirty.  “This isn’t McDonald’s, Ryan!”  This man was McDonald-o-phobic!  Everything bad resorted to McDonald’s.  I theorize that he must have had a bad childhood experience there at one time.  Perhaps he got stuck in one of the fun-tubes as a kid.
      The whole point of this ladies and gents is that Restaurant Manager’s are bad.  Managers are the devil!  They usually dress up in nicer clothes and rack up their debt so they can drive a nicer car.  Stay away from food restaurants because your life will go downhill from there.  And if you meet any gypsies, run like hell!           

Disclaimer- “Ranting Ryan” does not reflect the views of the entire staff.  “Ranting Ryan” is meant for comical purpose and should not be taken seriously.